I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize
