I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
