yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Randomize
