he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Randomize
