i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
Edward fifth and chaser hands
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
PS: I just woke up from my shower
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Randomize
