If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
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