I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Randomize
