By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize