lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
this hospital has no fireball
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
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