I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
