8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
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