therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
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