im drinking this country out of the recession.
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
Randomize
