last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
it glows. i had to have it.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
