Buhtt sex?
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
