oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
