Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize