I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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