Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
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