You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Randomize
