That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
this hospital has no fireball
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Randomize
