What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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