Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
