She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
