Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
