did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
