Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
