her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize
