um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
