i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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