I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
