I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Randomize
