Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
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