I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Randomize
