You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
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