Where are you?
In a non slutty way
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
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