I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
he had hair everywhere except his balls
So I just went to clothing optional bar
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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