We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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