Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
