that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
