mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Randomize
