if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Randomize
