Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
