She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Randomize
