I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
Randomize