Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
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