I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Randomize
