Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
Randomize
