Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Randomize
