Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
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