First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
