I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize
